Monday, September 10, 2012


Today is my Independence Day of sorts.

I have been struggling with different things in my life for so long.  My weight.  My self esteem.  Other people's happiness. My relationship with food. My relationships with people. Today I am breaking free of that!

I woke up this morning and thought to myself; why have I constantly let so much control what makes me happy?  I guess in part it's always been my nature.  I like to see people happy, and that usually has meant putting a lot of my wants and needs on the back burner.  I have always chosen to let what others think of me influence what I do, and what I think of myself.  I can see that some of that was wanting to be part of something.  I know that in a past relationship, I let myself fall into what I thought he wanted me to be.  I ate the "wrong" foods because he made it, since he wouldn't eat the healthier food I made.  I realized it had to stop.  I had my issues with  food for a long time and what I was doing to myself wasn't making the situation any better.   I realized that if he wasn't happy with the person I was, was there really any hope for us to be together?  It was time to focus on getting healthier, and I started on the first part of the weight loss/fitness journey that I am on.

I have learned through reading, and through my own trial and error that my body responds better to certain foods.  I have learned that the better I eat, meaning clean and healthy, that my body works better.

There are 30 days in a month. There are 4 months left in 2012.  I am going to take full advantage of that time  in order to use what God has put in to my life. He has put certain people and opportunities in my life for a reason.

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